Dear First Coast Tea Party

This is a post I made as a blog post to the First Coast Tea Party website. It will most likely not be Approved to be published but I figured I'd post it anyway.






Hello FCTP.



I haven't visited this site in a while, simply because I have felt lately I didn't belong anymore. Not only that, but I felt like I would be ridiculed for who I am if I arrived at an event. I also felt like being public would be embarrassed to my family members, some of which are, or were, members of the First Coast Tea Party. My father specifically.



But 5 days ago I got two correspondences from Leanna King over the issue of Jacksonville 2012-296. Specifically she was being supportive of Republican Rick Hartley in Opposing this change in our Jacksonville Laws (specifically the "Gender Identity and Expression.)



In this newsletter from Leanna, it states that adding "Gender Identity and Expression." to the Discrimination bill would allow for people to use it as an excuse for Sexual Misconduct, especially in the workplace. As an excuse for Sexual Harassment.




I Humbly Disagree.



Gender Identity is the internal identification of what your Gender Is. For the majority of people, they feel like the gender assigned them by the Sexual Characteristics identified on them by Doctors. These people can easily go through life without ever questioning "Am I a Man, My Penis Makes me one?" Or "Am I A woman simply because I was born with a Vagina?"



People who are comfortable with their Gender Identity and Sexual Configuration, can live their entire lives comfortably. They can wear the clothing that society decides is appropriate for them. Act the way society expects them to, and no one will ever harass them for being themselves.



There how ever is a very small population of people who grow up feeling extremely UNCOMFORTABLE with their Genital Configuration. Their Gender Identity Conflicts with their Sex that they were assigned at birth. They feel Alien in their own bodies, and in some cases, where they can't get help because of societal restrictions or the fear of discrimination, they simply commit suicide instead of living constantly feeling wrong.



The Majority of people who are Comfortable with their Assigned Genders will never feel that type of pain. But those who are not comfortable with their assigned gender feel that pain all day, all night, it invades their dreams, it invades every waking part of their being. Their mind screams "I'm a Freak" simply because in the minds Eye they see themselves opposite of what their doctor assigned them when they were born.



This discomfort, called Dysphoria or Gender Dysphoria, thus becomes the cause of secondary symptoms like Depression, Self-Harm, and eventually Suicide. 41% of respondents to a recent poll of those diagnosed with Gender Dysphoria have admitted seriously contemplating, or actually attempting Suicide.



41%. Almost Half. While the Percentage of those not afflicted with this Dysphoria is only just a little under 2%



For many of these people they find themselves with a choice, the only choice they can make. Suicide. The easy way out of a life of pain, confusion, self hatred, anger, and in some cases physical pain manifested from their depression. Or Transition.



Transition is the act of taking hormones, modifying your appearance, and in some cases, surgical reconfiguration of ones Genitalia. Not all people who Transition go as far as Genital Reconfiguration Surgery. But a vast majority of Trans*, Transsexual and Transgender people do.



Hormones can do a lot to help a person feel normal on their own. Recently a Neuroscience team discovered that the average Transwoman's (Someone who was born male and transitions to female) Brain actually had the shape and configuration of a Woman who was assigned Female at birth. So when a Transwoman actually starts Hormone Replacement therapy their brain beings to feel normal. For most their depression quickly disappears, their self hatred, and their self-harm stop, and the cases of them committing suicide drop significantly.



They feel normal once again, they feel happy. They feel like themselves. Until they are hit with harassment or discrimination. For being just that, themselves.



A Transwoman is not going to want to continue to wear tailored business suits to work, She may prefer to wear a Tailored Skirt Suit to work. It feels comfortable for her to do so. She may prefer to wear a dress at night when she goes out with her friends. She may even want to have a relationship with someone.



Or a Transman (someone transitioning from Female to Male) may want to wear that tailored Business suit. Or maybe even not work in a office at all and get a job in something like Construction, the Police, or even the Military.



But here in Jacksonville these people are not protected. They are told that they do not belong. They are told that they are ugly, gross, that they are dirt. And in some areas, this discrimination even leads to Murder. This discrimination brings back those feelings of self hate, and of suicide, to those who are Transgender.



This issue is close to me, because a year ago around this time, I could no longer handle how I felt. I couldn't handle the constant thoughts, desires, and hobbies I found entertaining that didn't reflect that I was male. I was tired of the people I had relationships with telling me I was too feminine for them when I had been born male. I was Tired of being called "Sir" or "He". When inside I just didn't feel it.



Around this time last year, I laid down in my bed, put a rifle in my mouth, and was about to pull the trigger when I was interrupted. That interruption snapped me out of the depression for a bit, but I found help before it came back for good and on my birthday last year, I turned 25, and I started transitioning.



I am Transgender. This wasn't a choice I made, I didn't make a choice to feel like a Woman in my head. It was a nagging buzz in the back of my head. Strange thoughts and actions that I just did on my own, but when found doing them I was punished for it and told it was for girls. Nothing I ever did to act out on my Gender Non-Conformity had to deal with Sexual Intercourse. It had nothing to do with my Sexual Orientation either, I Identify as Asexual (Lacking any desire to engage in sexual conduct or intercourse with anyone.), thought that isn't to say I do not want a relationship with someone. I just don't need anything more then the romance and companionship. Intercourse itself is Gross.



My Gender Expression, and my transition from Male to Female, had nothing to do with anyone else. It had nothing to do with how I was raised, it had nothing to do with my parents, or my interests in what I wanted to do for my job. It was completely about feeling comfortable in my own skin.



This month I will turn 26, It is also my first year anniversary of being on Hormone Replacement Therapy and I have a consultation for my Surgery next week. I am gendered 90% of the time now as Female. And every time someone simply acknowledges me as "Ma'am" "Miss" or "Her" I smile. Because now other people see me how I always felt about myself.



I'm Lucky though, The company I work for has been extremely supportive of me. Others have not been so lucky. Here in Jacksonville, most companies would just Fire someone for being Trans. And that was a fear I had when I first came out to my HR Rep and supervisor. It was a huge fear that me becoming true to myself would end my career.



I was lucky, not everyone was.



Before you stand outside city hall, yelling and screaming that you don't think people like me need protections, think.



What right was given to you to tell me I couldn't wear a skirt, if I wanted to, to work? What right was given to you to tell me I had to hide my breasts with a binder so that they didn't protrude from my chest? What right was given to you to tell any Trans person that they are wrong about their gender identity?



2012-296 doesn't give me any rights. It doesn't say I can walk up to someone and expose my genitalia at them. It doesn't say I can walk around with minimal clothing on. It doesn't say I can sexually harass someone else. It gives me NO rights.



296 does one thing, It makes sure people don't impede the few rights I do have.



Life, Liberty, The Pursuit of Happiness. It doesn't let me interfere with your rights.



My Gender Identity is mine, Not yours. I choose to express it by painting my fingernails, having my hair styled, and Wearing a nice outfit. These things do not sexually assault or harass you. These things do not interfere with your rights. The things I do to feel comfortable with my outside appearance do nothing to harm you.



You can choose to express yours how ever you want. I'm not going to interfere with that. And that is all I ask of you, to not interfere with mine.



Treat me how you want to be treated.